Writers Gotta Write

Writers Gotta Write — Blue Ink Alchemy

I think one of the worst things you can do as a writer is sit idle. I don't mean physically, though that probably comes into it. The remote control, the take-out menu, the bottle of booze - they're all comforts we reach for in general. Writers in particular can feel affected, even exhausted, by what they do. You finish a project, a novel, a round of pitches, and you feel absolutely spent. You just want to take a moment to get away from the pen, the word processor, the outline and the query. So you pour yourself some sweet succor and kick back. But what then? Intellectually, we know writers have to write. It's nothing short of a moral imperative. It's in our blood, and once it's taken hold it's not going to let go. We can do our level best to ignore it, of course, but the longer we do that, the more it'll gnaw at us. We might keep a journal, maintain a blog, post on forums. But these are little more than stopgap measures. They hold off the beast in our brains for another day or so. Then the ideas start popping up in our heads again. Square-jawed heroes with jet packs and ray guns. Werewolf fiends with viscera dripping from their jaws. Good-looking girls who also happen to be tough as coffin nails. Fairies that giggle as they turn innocent travellers into twitsed abominations. Flying cats. Channeling this creative energy in a productive direction can be a daunting task. It means stepping away from those comforts. We have to put away the snacks, turn off the television, stay off the tweets and bulletin boards. When you get right down to it, writing is work, and after work is done for the day the prospect of more work just isn't all that appealing. But writers gotta write. We set goals for ourselves. An outline in an hour. A thousand words a day. A story every fortnight. We try to structure our time in such a way that we can better focus the energies that tease the edges of our imagination when our minds come to something resembling a halt and we might consider distracting ourselves in some way, shape or form. Art is creative chaos, and writing is an art. Imposing order on chaos is something that sounds good in practice but tends to suffer in execution. The trick is not to overdo it. You can say that you'll spend the hours between X and Y writing Z words, but the truth is the chaos will rebel against it in the form of the way we seek excuses to stop writing. The dog will need to be walked. We'll remember the trash needs gathering. We'll catch a glimpse of the pile of dishes in the sink (and did that one just move?) and resolve to scrub a few. I could go on. In those situations, remember how far you've come towards your goal and how much is left. It'll be easy to forget in the process of tending to those outside influences, and say "Well, I wrote something at least. Time for more fun! Fire up the tweets! Ale and whores for all!" Stop. Think. You have a goal to meet and you haven't met it yet. Chances are it's closer than you think, and if you can get on a roll you might even exceed it. But the only way you'll find out is if you keep your focus on the words and continue to let them flow. They want to come out, arrange on the page, thrive within the story. We just have to let them hitch a ride down our neurons from our brainpans to our fingertips. That takes time, focus and energy, and we may be disinclined to expend those things on a task that is less fun than the many distractions that tempt and tease us. Just remember. You're a writer. And writers gotta write.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Maverick Meerkat

Maverick Meerkat — Blue Ink Alchemy

Dear Windows, You and I are done personally. Professionally we can still work together. It's not like I have a choice in that. And I'll still know my way around in you so that people can call me up for tech support at odd hours of the day and night. Because, you know, that's what happens when you work with or even claim to know computers. Suddenly you're everybody's tech support hotline. But at home? I'm sorry, but I shouldn't need to jump through a series of flaming hoops to prove I haven't stolen anything from you. And anyway, what would be the point? There's no reason for me to try and pull a fast one on you when a perfectly good operating system is available for free that not only does everything you do, but provides me with all sorts of granular control over aspects of its appearance, operation and technical workings. That's right. I'm leaving you for Ubuntu. Specifically, the Maverick Meerkat. How does that nickname not have appeal? "Maverick Meerkat." It's like Timon ditched the big boar, found a Punisher t-shirt his size and decided to start meting out his own form of jungle justice. Or took up flying fighter jets. In any event, with the way it's up and running on my desktop I really have no reason to go back to you. Sure, some kinks need to be ironed out in the way certain games and applications work. And I'll need to find a good Linux-based video editing suite if I ever want to do another video version of IT CAME FROM NETFLX! but this is a small price to pay. That is to say, it costs me nothing financially. And after I finish backing everything up, I've half a mind to get the latest Xubuntu build on a flash drive and reformat the laptop again. Clean up some things. Get everything running more smoothly. I'd say I'm sorry it had to end this way, Windows, but let's face it... I'm not. At least you still have my wife's computer. For now.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Book Review: Irregular Creatures

Book Review: Irregular Creatures — Blue Ink Alchemy

There have been doorstopper fantasies and sci-fi epics that have kept me enraptured for every page. Short fiction has a bigger task, as it needs to grab me, pull me in and keep me in the nuances of its story not with every page, but with every single word. Not every writer can do it. Chuck Wendig does. Irregular Creatures captures the madness, the brilliance and the desperation of ten years in a writer's life. It has pieces long and short, narratives that tug the heartstrings and images that chill the blood. It's a literary roller-coaster, the long hill of the opener coupled with quick drops and sudden, neck-snapping turns that surprise and confound. Any reader with the savvy and intestinal fortitude to pick this up will not be disappointed, and may ruminate upon the stories within for days to come or longer. Okay, hyperbole and back-cover-copy aside? It's 3 bucks. For 8 stories. That will completely blow your mind. Scroll back up and click "Buy." You won't be sorry. Disturbed, surprised, impressed? Yes. Sorry? No.

So that's the Amazon version. Was trying to keep it short for the benefit of bleary-eyed Amazonians just looking for a quick fix to get them through the cold, white months. Hopefully they found it helpful. Here's the longer, blow-by-blow version. There are synopses for these over on the page where you buy the thing, so let me tell you how each one hits you and where, and why each of them work on different levels. Dog-Man and Cat-Bird (A Flying Cat Story) is that long hill before the initial big drop I mentioned. This one doesn't just tug on your heartstrings, it gives them a hearty pull and then throws you over its shoulder into its dark but uplifting world. It's a ride, start to finish, a microcosm of the entire work. Even if it weren't part of an anthology, it'd be a stand-out bit of modern supernatural fantasy/horror. The protagonist is instantly relatable and earnest, the characters are realistically drawn to a one and it never feels contrived on any level. It justifies the entire project in and of itself. It's no wonder Cat-Bird is on the thing's cover. A Radioactive Monkey follows the long drop with a short twist. A good little cautionary tale that still plays with our expectations. Clearly, whatever the reality taking unknown drinks from strange women is a bad idea. Product Placement takes us to a place that is instantly familiar and thoroughly alien. You may take a closer look at the contents of your nearest vending machine the next time you're craving a candy bar. This Guy is you. Maybe. It could be. That's the hook, the horror of it. The narrator's an everyday guy, at least he starts out that way. But every day for the everyday guy is and feels the same, and that can change you. It feels like a straight on the coaster before it drops again. Mister Muh's Pussy Show feels greasy, dirty, delicious and very much a guilty pleasure. Lethe and Mnemosyne. It uses every single fucking word precisely. Brilliant. The Auction brings us back to fairy tale land. With a child protagonist and something that's two parts Dahl and two parts Barker, we're in for another wild ride. It front-loads with promise and, like the rest of the tales, does not disappoint. Beware of Owner is another short that quickly yanks the rug out from under us. You can almost hear Chuck giggling as the full scope of the situation dawns upon us. Bastard. Do-Overs and Take-Backs rounds out the anthology with another cautionary tale and a fine example of dual plot tracks slowly but surely becoming entwined. It has the horror, the humor, the weirdness and the brilliance of all that came before, and still remains its own creature. (See that? See what I did there?) So, yeah, like I said. 3 bucks for 8 stories that'll blow your mind. Basically, we're robbing Chuck blind. He's poured years of his heart and soul into this and we walk away with it for a song. You'll be hard-pressed to find a better deal pretty much anywhere.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

IT CAME FROM NETFLIX! Splice

IT CAME FROM NETFLIX! Splice — Blue Ink Alchemy

[audio:http://www.blueinkalchemy.com/uploads/splice.mp3] When I was growing up I would hear of stories, movies or episodes of television that were touted as 'not for the faint of heart.' They promised thrills and surprises aimed at an adult audience, one that could handle the nature of the material. Not that they wouldn't have nightmares afterward, mind you, just that they could handle those nightmares. Had Splice come out in such a time, it definitely would have been called not for the faint of heart. I'd go one step further, though, and say it's not for the slow of brain, either. Have you ever seen scientists acting or treated like rock stars? That's the best way to describe Clive and Elsa. Iconoclastic, brilliant and possessed of the particular kind of crazy that makes advancements in modern science possible, they're splicing together designer organisms for the benefit of a major bio-tech firm interested in the next big pharmacuetical breakthrough. Recent success has shown them the potential of splicing human DNA into the mix to provide clues for things like curing cancer and growing organs. Their sponsors, fearing a moral backlash, put the kibosh on that idea. So Clive and Elsa do it anyway. The experiment starts going awry almost immediately, but does result in a viable organism. Her name is Dren. If I were to give a single piece of advice when it comes to Splice, I'd say go into it without any expectations. The movie's plot, characters and structure pull the viewer in and carry them along while teasing their mind with questions of morality and scientific advancement. It doesn't necessary spoon-feed you answers, but it doesn't assume you don't know what's going on either. It's the kind of movie that rewards, rather than punishes, higher thought aimed in its direction. It's one of those movies you'll be thinking about after you see it, and any revulsion you feel will probably be aimed at the subtleties of the subject matter rather than the movie itself. This isn't a cheap, knock-off creature feature, folks. This is thoroughly cerebral and deeply disturbing science fiction.
Something made a nummy noise, and it wasn't Clive or Elsa. Director Vincenzo Natali provides the movie with its very careful pace and nuanced mood. It's clear that in telling this story, he not only wants to entertain, he wants to raise questions. And the questions end up being as shocking as the entertainment. How much is science being held back by old ideas and antique sentiments? While the motivations of Clive and Elsa's superiors might be rooted firmly in finances, the impetus for their reluctance to back the scientists up is framed in the notion that "there would be a moral outrage." As much as the duo extol the virtues and potential benefits of their work, it's unfortunately true that champions of 'decency' and religion would be inconsolably enraged and disturbed at the very idea of using human material in designer organisms. The movie, however, never really addresses this issue and keeps its focus tightly on our pair of protagonists. Sarah Polley and Adrien Brody play Elsa and Clive as very smart people with bright ideas and disapproving superiors, forced to go rogue and underground to make those ideas come to life. But over and above their idealism and intelligence is the fact that these are very much people, with all that entails. Sure, they're brilliant, attractive and have great attitudes, but they're also flawed human beings with neuroses and insecurities. A lot of movies in this vein can dial down the human element to emphasize the monstser or monsters in play, but Splice doesn't do that. It never feels like a firm line is drawn with one side of the argument in the right while the other is wrong. It's left up to us to decide, and at the same time, we're presented with the question of Dren.
Beautiful and disturbing at the same time, like a lot of stuff on DeviantArt. For all of its highbrow ideas and good characterisation, this is still essentially a monster movie, and what a monster we have! Dren's evolution happens before our very eyes, and without speaking a word she conveys volumes of emotion and information. As she matured I was reminded of the otherworldiness of a young Milla Jovovich in the Fifth Element, with the ways Dren moves and interacts with the world around her. This feeling is deepened with the subtle blending of great acting on the part of Delphine Chaneac and CGI never overwhelms the humanity of the actors. Dren is, like her 'parents', a very human creature, but is also so inhuman that it's always quite clear we're dealing with something different, something curious and intelligent... something thoroughly dangerous. I've tried my utmost to avoid spoiling anything, because Splice is a movie best served without preamble or preconception. Like I said, leave your expectations at the door when this one starts. Unlike a lot of modern movies out there, it doesn't hesitate to engage the mind while simultaneously entertaining and occasionally horrifying the senses. It never plays its odd elements for cheap scares, and disturbs in a way that's much more David Cronenberg's The Fly than anything dreamt up by Wes Craven or even Stephen King. It's a superlative piece of work, probably the best science fiction film I've seen since Moon, and definitely, definitely worth a place on your Netflix queue. Josh Loomis can't always make it to the local megaplex, and thus must turn to alternative forms of cinematic entertainment. There might not be overpriced soda pop & over-buttered popcorn, and it's unclear if this week's film came in the mail or was delivered via the dark & mysterious tubes of the Internet. Only one thing is certain... IT CAME FROM NETFLIX.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Work Involving Home

Work Involving Home — Blue Ink Alchemy

Courtesy Terribleminds The recent influx of white fluffy stuff falling from the sky in the eastern United States has driven lots of people to stay in their homes. Call it what you will - Snowmageddon, Snoviathan, Snowtorious B.I.G. - there are folks like myself doing their utmost to be productive in places where familiar comforts quickly become distractions. There is, however, a distinction in my mind between working from home and working at home. When one works from home, it's a break in the usual office routine. Sure, you don't have to worry about commuting outside of your home, nor do you need to concern yourself with adhering to the company's dress code (if you get dressed at all), but there are still expectations from your superiors and deadlines that need to be met. All of the pressures of the office still exist. If you're not doing something you necessarily love, it can actually be detrimental to work from home. There are chores left undone, upkeep responsibilities and more comforts than at the office, all of which become distractions. Indeed, in certain circumstances, washing dishes or mopping up leaks can feel like a welcome diversion from the usual office work. At first glance, you might not see much of a difference when you work at home. By that, I mean you are employed in such a way that you have no office to go to regularly. Maybe you're a freelancer, or maybe you're employed in such a way that the location of the office is superfluous - if it exists at all! In these cases, you still have other things to do rather than work and there are still deadlines to meet. However, my suspicion is that there are two large factors that differentiate working at home from working from home. 1. You're working at home on something that's more your choice than not. Most people who are in a position of using a home office over the course of a regular work week have gotten to that point from the pursuit of a specific goal rather than a series of fortunate events. To put it another way... 2. Chances are you're doing something you love every day and getting paid for it without leaving your house. I know there are a lot of other factors that go into that sort of job: no pre-paid medical insurance (at least in the US), no paid vacations (you have to take work with you when you go elsewhere), the ever-present fear of bill collections in a lull between completing a project and getting paid because you don't get a regular paycheck. I understand those things. It's simply unfortunate, from my perspective, that these difficulties make working at home such an impractical choice for people who feel underappreciated or underpaid even when they do work normal hours attempting to live up to expectations they might never meet. Yes, working at home brings in a whole slew of headaches completely unrelated to working from home, but personally, I can't help but be just a bit envious. I'm going to stop depressing myself and get a mug of hot cocoa. Because one of the benefits of work involving home, be it at or from, is easy access to marshmallows.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Work Involving Home

Work Involving Home — Blue Ink Alchemy

Courtesy Terribleminds The recent influx of white fluffy stuff falling from the sky in the eastern United States has driven lots of people to stay in their homes. Call it what you will - Snowmageddon, Snoviathan, Snowtorious B.I.G. - there are folks like myself doing their utmost to be productive in places where familiar comforts quickly become distractions. There is, however, a distinction in my mind between working from home and working at home. When one works from home, it's a break in the usual office routine. Sure, you don't have to worry about commuting outside of your home, nor do you need to concern yourself with adhering to the company's dress code (if you get dressed at all), but there are still expectations from your superiors and deadlines that need to be met. All of the pressures of the office still exist. If you're not doing something you necessarily love, it can actually be detrimental to work from home. There are chores left undone, upkeep responsibilities and more comforts than at the office, all of which become distractions. Indeed, in certain circumstances, washing dishes or mopping up leaks can feel like a welcome diversion from the usual office work. At first glance, you might not see much of a difference when you work at home. By that, I mean you are employed in such a way that you have no office to go to regularly. Maybe you're a freelancer, or maybe you're employed in such a way that the location of the office is superfluous - if it exists at all! In these cases, you still have other things to do rather than work and there are still deadlines to meet. However, my suspicion is that there are two large factors that differentiate working at home from working from home. 1. You're working at home on something that's more your choice than not. Most people who are in a position of using a home office over the course of a regular work week have gotten to that point from the pursuit of a specific goal rather than a series of fortunate events. To put it another way... 2. Chances are you're doing something you love every day and getting paid for it without leaving your house. I know there are a lot of other factors that go into that sort of job: no pre-paid medical insurance (at least in the US), no paid vacations (you have to take work with you when you go elsewhere), the ever-present fear of bill collections in a lull between completing a project and getting paid because you don't get a regular paycheck. I understand those things. It's simply unfortunate, from my perspective, that these difficulties make working at home such an impractical choice for people who feel underappreciated or underpaid even when they do work normal hours attempting to live up to expectations they might never meet. Yes, working at home brings in a whole slew of headaches completely unrelated to working from home, but personally, I can't help but be just a bit envious. I'm going to stop depressing myself and get a mug of hot cocoa. Because one of the benefits of work involving home, be it at or from, is easy access to marshmallows.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

The Zones in Cataclysm

The Zones in Cataclysm — Blue Ink Alchemy

In the Burning Crusade, Blizzard opened up an entire new world. For Wrath of the Lich King, the continent of Northrend became available. Now, in Cataclysm, a mere handful of new zones have been added to the existing contents. While this makes a lot of sense given the major cosmetic and mechanical changes to Azeroth due to Deathwing wrecking everybody's homestead, if this trend continues, the next expansion will give us a bit of land about the size of Cuba players will fight over to establish their own banana republic. Anyway, I recently concluded the quests and exploration of these new zones. Here are my thoughts on them, and unlike certain punditry outlets, I'm going to try and keep this as fair as possible.

Mount Hyjal

Since the conclusion of the Third War, the area atop Mount Hyjal in northern Kalimdor has been inaccessible, due to the world tree Nordrassil being protected by rampant overgrowth. While once this was believed to be a scar concealing a near-fatal wound, the emergence of Deathwing burned the growth away to reveal that Nordrassil had been healing all along. As druids and servants of Cenarius flocked to the site to protect the Tree, Deathwing has called upon his Twilight Hammer cultists and summoned an ally to burn the Tree to ashes once and for all: the Firelord Ragnaros. If you're a long-time fan of Warcraft and enamoured with its lore, Hyjal's a great place to start. While its opening quests feel a bit like the same-old "Kill X amount of monster Y" in a forest not unlike that around the night elf starting zone, interacting with the legendary Ancients and the buildup to the final chain make the questing worthwhile outside of the material rewards. It definitely gets you into the feeling of older Warcraft games in terms of setting and lore, but it also reminds the player of older content best left forgotten. Overall, though, a pretty solid zone.

Vashj'ir

Thrall has made his choice, abdicating leadership of the Horde to Garrosh Hellscream and becoming leader of Azeroth's shamans, the Earthen Ring. The Maelstrom in the middle of the sea has grown even more tumultuous in the wake of Deathwing's awakening, and he has called for champions to aid him in preserving the balance of elements. En route, however, adventurers find themselves assaulted by a vicious sea monster and dragged into the cold depths below. With help from the Earthen Ring, the source of this kraken must be discovered, and answers lie within the sunken elven city of Vash'jir. Vashj'ir is the other 'starting' area of Cataclysm's new content, and it begins with a bang that plunges its players quite literally into unfamiliar waters. Over and above all else, the visuals in the zone are absolutely stunning. The diversity and danger of deep sea life is captured quite well, considering the engine is six years old. However, it's not all good news beneath the waves. Needing to navigate and fight in three dimensions can be disorienting at first, and even once you get the hang of it, adequate view distance may not be enough to save you from a band of angry creatures diving toward you seemingly out of nowhere. The lore within the area feels tangential to the rest of the content of the expansion, and while the look inside naga society is interesting, the goblin submarine a neat distraction and the cephalopod exploration unique (if somewhat disturbing for some), the bulk of the zone doesn't really stand out the way others do. It's not as bad as some people might make it out to be, which shouldn't be a surprise considering this is the WoW community we're talking about, but I feel it's the weakest of the five zones. Which is a bit like saying The Two Towers is the weakest of the Lord of the Rings trilogy of films. Relative to the other two, it might be true, but relative to other films they tend to blow everything else out of the water. So, your mileage may vary.

Deepholm

Deathwing tore his way back to Azeroth and left nothing untouched in his wake. Even the Elemental Plane of Earth was affected, as the pillar supporting Azeroth from below was cracked. While the druids tend to the World Tree above, the World Pillar below threatens to collapse, taking Azeroth with it. To prevent this, one must venture into Deepholm, home of the Stone Mother Therazane. The Twilight Hammer has made beachheads here, and adventurers must put a stop to their misddeds if the world is to be saved. In this place, the cultists and heroes have something in common: they are unwelcome. Like Vashj'ir, this is a zone that has a lot of eye candy going for it. Instead of making things a uniform gray or brown, color explodes out of corners of Deepholm almost without warning. Adding the characterization of Therazane to that of Ragnaros and Neptulon (the lord of Water, featured at the end of Vashj'ir's final quest chain and its solitary dungeon) expands the history of Azeroth in an interesting way, and other NPCs make time spent in Deepholm worthwhile. Mylra quickly became my second-favorite dwarf behind Brann Bronzebead. Deepholm is also like Vashj'ir in some moments of tedium, and unlike Vashj'ir, the nature of the rewards from gaining reputation with Therazane means it's more than likely you'll be coming back. Still, I enjoyed Deepholm more than Vashj'ir, and I look forward to earning the Pebble vanity pet. Who knew a pet rock could be so gosh-darn cute?

Uldum

The sands have uncovered forgotten lands due to the shift brought about by Deathwing. To the south of Tanaris lies the lost land of Uldum, an ancient desert kingdom used by the Titans for experimentation. In addition to its curious indigenous people is evidence of the Titans' work, valuable to both archaeologists who would study it and dark opportunists who would usurp it. Finally, the djinn-like beings that have seized control of the Elemental Plane of Air had come to Azeroth through Uldum, allying themselves with Deathwing. No matter what you seek in Uldum, you won't be bored. The introduction of the society in Ramkahen deepens the diversity of life on Azeroth even if their presence may feel tangential to some. The quests in Uldum are a particular delight, changing pace and focus quite often in addition to packing the zone with hiarlious references. Individual quests can harken to everything from The Great Escape to Katamari Damacy, and then there's the long chain that just might have you whistling the Indiana Jones theme. The dungeons in Uldum are a diverse lot and continue the trend of changing up challenges. The only circumstances under which someone might not enjoy Uldum is if they find these sorts of things tedious or just don't like deserts.

Twilight Highlands

Seat of the Twilight's Hammer and its leader, the mad ogre-mage Cho'gall, the Twilight Highlands are also the site of a conflict that has not ceased in ages, between the Wildhammer dwarves and the Dragonmaw orcs. Despite the looming mutual threat of Deathwing and his cronies, these two just won't stop killing each other. While there may not be an end to hostilities in sight, canny adventurers can win some support from their respective if wayward allies and make an assault upon not only the Twilight's Hammer's holdings, but also upon Deathwing himself, with a little help from Alexstraza and the red dreagonflight. The Highlands get off to a good start, tossing the player into the conflict bodily. There are bits of very enjoyable questing here, from the Horde opening to the assault on the Bastion's gates, but between these bits is some cross-faction conflict that underscores the resurgence of lore-friendly PvP in Cataclysm. As hilarious as it is to set fire to Wildhammer kegs only to see them violently explode - they're something like 200 proof - I personally felt that dealing with the mutual threat of Deathwing and the Twilight Hammer should come before perpetuating very old grudges. This doesn't make the content in the middle of Twilight Highlands bad, per se, and it's a solid zone overall especially in comparison to Vashj'ir. It could also be that, despite being Horde, I've always liked the Wildhammer dwarves and I felt a little bad scoping and dropping so many of the amusing and badass woad-wearing drunken brawlers. There you have it. In my completely subjective and not-at-all authoritative opinion, Uldum is the strongest zone of Cataclysm while Vashj'ir comes up a bit short. However, all of the Cataclysm material represents a high point in Blizzard's design, a welcome departure from the things that made Wrath of the Lich King so tedious in general. While that expansion had only a few standout zones, every single area of Cataclysm has something going for it.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Into the Nentir Vale, Part 8

Into the Nentir Vale, Part 8 — Blue Ink Alchemy

The Nentir Vale is a campaign setting provided to new players of Dungeons & Dragons 4th Edition. It's present in the Red Box and most of the starting materials. For a party almost all completely new to D&D and a DM re-familiarizing himself with the latest edition, it's a great place to start a campaign. This will be an ongoing recollection of what happens to the party as they make their way through the Nentir Vale. Enjoy. Previously: The Resistance Grows In the wake of the brawl, the four adventurers are directed to the livery in the northern part of Albridge. There they finally meet Dar Gramath, the de facto leader of the resistance against the Iron Circle. Faced with needing to organize his people into an armed resistance, Dar Gramath suggested to the heroes that interdicting some of the supply runs taking place across the Harkenwold would disrupt Iron Circle operations and distract them from what were, essentially, troop movements. The party was in favor of this plan, especially Lyria.

"I come from a long line of..." "Thieves?" "Canadians?" "... grizzlies!" - Danielle, Mike & Ben on Lyria's lineage

The supply routes used by the Iron Circle are known to Dar Gramath, but nobody has undertaken operations against the mercenaries due to fear of reprisal against their families. The foursome of outsiders, on the other hand, have no such concerns and plan an ambush. The chosen area has some standing stones by the side of the road, making for excellent cover. As Lyria and Andrasian adeptly get into position on top of the stones, Krillorien gives Melanie a boost, only to have her slip and fall on top of him.

"I like this plan." "Try again." "wait, no, give me a second down here..." - Mike and Ben after Ben fails his roll and gets a face full of Melanie's good melons

After surviving his vision of marshmallow hell, Krillorien gets Melanie in position and gets into a hiding place himself.

Ben was a little confused on skill rolls, Danielle tried to explain: "Say you have to roll dungeoneering for something." "'You have to roll dungeoneering for something.'" "Say you have to do that." "'You have to do that.'"

The caravan came into sight after a short wait. It was a single horse-drawn cart flanked by Iron Circle soldiers and lead by a hound-like construct. It did not catch the scent of the party, and they set upon the caravan before the dark adept sitting beside the cart's driver knew what was happening. The horse was freed from its restraints and bolted down the path a bit as the fighting ensued. Melanie needed a moment to gather her wits for spellcasting after taking a bad step off of the ledge she'd been hiding on.

"You must have popped a lung when you landed on your boobs." - Ben

It wasn't long before Melanie's spells took their toll upon the Iron Circle.

"My bosoms emit a phantasmal energy!" - Eric

With the guardians of the cargo dead, the party claimed it for themselves. They also took ownership of the horse, debating whether to cede it to Dar Gramath or keep it as well. "You can ride it back," Krillorien told Melanie, "as long as you don't ride side-saddle." "No problem!" Melanie favored the men with a smile as Lyria rolled her eyes. "I don't think you're talking about the same thing anymore." They returned to Albridge to discover that, thanks to their distraction, Dar Gramath had contacted Tor's Hold to begin organizing those willing to fight the Iron Circle. However, to ensure that all of the Harkenwold would rise up against the oppressors, they would need the allgiance of the Woodsinger elves living deep in the forest. Andrasian did not like this turn of events; it's possible he and his family do not get along for some reason. The Woodsingers are a cagey, xenophobic tribe, and were unwilling to join up with the others within the Harkenwold facing Iron Circle rule without proof that their sacrifice was warranted. To prove their good faith, the adventurers were charged with destroying an ancient evil within the forest. A travelling cleric from elsewhere in the Nentir Vale, who matched the description of Malareth, had been seen in the wood near ancient standing stones serving as the entry to a forgotten elven city. The only way in involved a vial of green dragon's blood and the name of the city. With this information, the party made their way to the standing stones. Goblin minions bearing the mark of Irontooth slept nearby in a broken-down cart as large spiders roamed the canopies of the trees. Sneaking through the underbrush, Andrasian poured the blood onto the plinth and spoke the name of the city, and the party found themselves whisked away by ancient, arcane means... Next: Dal Nystiere All locations, NPCs, spells and equipment copyright Wizards of the Coast unless otherwise noted.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Into the Nentir Vale: Part 9

Into the Nentir Vale: Part 9 — Blue Ink Alchemy

The Nentir Vale is a campaign setting provided to new players of Dungeons & Dragons 4th Edition. It's present in the Red Box and most of the starting materials. For a party almost all completely new to D&D and a DM re-familiarizing himself with the latest edition, it's a great place to start a campaign. This will be an ongoing recollection of what happens to the party as they make their way through the Nentir Vale. Enjoy. Previously: Caravans & Standing Stones The disorienting teleportation effect faded from the foursome and they found themselves in a dark, underground room lit by sconces and populated with goblins. A half-dozen, to be exact, with a couple vicious drakes in cages. Before any of them could move, however, Melanie was already preparing a spell to doom the diminutive greenskins.

"She does critical damage to TIME and SPACE!" - Eric, on Melanie's initiative roll of 30.

The goblin in charge was Snilvor, an emissary from Irontooth, and he did his utmost to hex the party into submission. As they tore into his minions, however, he ordered the drakes released. The beasts were far more dangerous than their goblin handlers, but were poorly trained and hungry, snapping at anything with meat on it that wandered too close. Lyria alighted onto one of the cages and stabbed one before it could grab hold of a teammate rather than a goblin. Snilvor's attempts to dominate members of the party failed, with Andrasian taking the brunt of the damage in the form of a skull-splitting headache. While the minions were easily dispatched, Snilvor turned out to be something of an annoyance, avoiding close range with the adventurers while flinging his spells. An area on the raised dias in the room caused damage to all who entered it, pushing Andrasian to his limits. However, there was only so much room for Snilvor to use in his attempts to escape, and Lyria's knives finally silenced the emissary.

"We live to suck another day!" - Mike, having nearly dropped to 0 HP during the fight.

Beyond the doors from that room was the workshop proper, a converted reflection hall in which the undead mage Yisarn had laid out the bones of a dragon. A glimmerweb spider crouched in the corner, and skeletal minions turned towards the interlopers. Upon stepping into the room, however, a trap was triggered and Krillorien fell into a pit, barely avoiding getting impaled by the spikes waiting for him. As Lyria ran along the wall to reach the other side, Andrasian took a running leap while Melanie slipped into the pit after the cleric of Pelor.

"Crap, one of these deflated. I'm using Ghost Hand to hold it up!" - Eric, on the damage done to Melanie's 'girls'

Despite their weakened state, the foursome put up a valiant fight against the undead. Krillorien's divine light tore through the defenses of Yisarn's minions, and Andrasian's axe did the rest. Yisarn himself proved a difficult foe, lightning leaping from his skeletal hand and ice blasting across the room in focused shards. The good news was that in the confusion, the spider was unable to ensnare anyone with its bright, blinding webs. Without the stealth upon which it usually relied, it was a marginalized threat. The party focused on Yisarn, taking down the undead mage before it could either kill them or awaken its dark experiment. After the unlife had left the bones wrapped in robes, they turned to the spider and chased it around the room in a scene reminiscent of their fight with Snilvor. While dangerous, it was still only a beast at the mercy of the four seasoned adventurers. After it was over, they gathered up what items of interest they could find. Krillorien found a half-burnt holy symbol of Pelor. It looked familiar, but he was unable to place where he'd seen it before. Perhaps Marla of Fallcrest would know. Meanwhile, Melanie found a sack of gold, Andrasian uncovered a small handful of gems, and Lyria plucked a ring from the finger of Yisarn. It was a platinum ring with an obsidian inlay of a lightning bolt, but neither Melanie the wizard nor Krillorien the eladrin were able to determine its purpose. Weighing it in her hand, Lyria estimated it was worth over three hundred gold.

"Wait! How does she know what it's worth but we don't know what it does?" "I'm a fence! ... I mean..." - Ben and Danielle on the failed Arcana rolls and Lyria's ability to appraise

The party took time to rest. They needed to return to the Woodsingers to report on their success, and pray that they would not be too late to save the Harkenwold from the Iron Circle... Next: The Battle of Albridge All locations, NPCs, spells and equipment copyright Wizards of the Coast unless otherwise noted.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Into the Nentir Vale, Part 8

Into the Nentir Vale, Part 8 — Blue Ink Alchemy

The Nentir Vale is a campaign setting provided to new players of Dungeons & Dragons 4th Edition. It's present in the Red Box and most of the starting materials. For a party almost all completely new to D&D and a DM re-familiarizing himself with the latest edition, it's a great place to start a campaign. This will be an ongoing recollection of what happens to the party as they make their way through the Nentir Vale. Enjoy. Previously: The Resistance Grows In the wake of the brawl, the four adventurers are directed to the livery in the northern part of Albridge. There they finally meet Dar Gramath, the de facto leader of the resistance against the Iron Circle. Faced with needing to organize his people into an armed resistance, Dar Gramath suggested to the heroes that interdicting some of the supply runs taking place across the Harkenwold would disrupt Iron Circle operations and distract them from what were, essentially, troop movements. The party was in favor of this plan, especially Lyria.

"I come from a long line of..." "Thieves?" "Canadians?" "... grizzlies!" - Danielle, Mike & Ben on Lyria's lineage

The supply routes used by the Iron Circle are known to Dar Gramath, but nobody has undertaken operations against the mercenaries due to fear of reprisal against their families. The foursome of outsiders, on the other hand, have no such concerns and plan an ambush. The chosen area has some standing stones by the side of the road, making for excellent cover. As Lyria and Andrasian adeptly get into position on top of the stones, Krillorien gives Melanie a boost, only to have her slip and fall on top of him.

"I like this plan." "Try again." "wait, no, give me a second down here..." - Mike and Ben after Ben fails his roll and gets a face full of Melanie's good melons

After surviving his vision of marshmallow hell, Krillorien gets Melanie in position and gets into a hiding place himself.

Ben was a little confused on skill rolls, Danielle tried to explain: "Say you have to roll dungeoneering for something." "'You have to roll dungeoneering for something.'" "Say you have to do that." "'You have to do that.'"

The caravan came into sight after a short wait. It was a single horse-drawn cart flanked by Iron Circle soldiers and lead by a hound-like construct. It did not catch the scent of the party, and they set upon the caravan before the dark adept sitting beside the cart's driver knew what was happening. The horse was freed from its restraints and bolted down the path a bit as the fighting ensued. Melanie needed a moment to gather her wits for spellcasting after taking a bad step off of the ledge she'd been hiding on.

"You must have popped a lung when you landed on your boobs." - Ben

It wasn't long before Melanie's spells took their toll upon the Iron Circle.

"My bosoms emit a phantasmal energy!" - Eric

With the guardians of the cargo dead, the party claimed it for themselves. They also took ownership of the horse, debating whether to cede it to Dar Gramath or keep it as well. "You can ride it back," Krillorien told Melanie, "as long as you don't ride side-saddle." "No problem!" Melanie favored the men with a smile as Lyria rolled her eyes. "I don't think you're talking about the same thing anymore." They returned to Albridge to discover that, thanks to their distraction, Dar Gramath had contacted Tor's Hold to begin organizing those willing to fight the Iron Circle. However, to ensure that all of the Harkenwold would rise up against the oppressors, they would need the allgiance of the Woodsinger elves living deep in the forest. Andrasian did not like this turn of events; it's possible he and his family do not get along for some reason. The Woodsingers are a cagey, xenophobic tribe, and were unwilling to join up with the others within the Harkenwold facing Iron Circle rule without proof that their sacrifice was warranted. To prove their good faith, the adventurers were charged with destroying an ancient evil within the forest. A travelling cleric from elsewhere in the Nentir Vale, who matched the description of Malareth, had been seen in the wood near ancient standing stones serving as the entry to a forgotten elven city. The only way in involved a vial of green dragon's blood and the name of the city. With this information, the party made their way to the standing stones. Goblin minions bearing the mark of Irontooth slept nearby in a broken-down cart as large spiders roamed the canopies of the trees. Sneaking through the underbrush, Andrasian poured the blood onto the plinth and spoke the name of the city, and the party found themselves whisked away by ancient, arcane means... Next: Dal Nystiere All locations, NPCs, spells and equipment copyright Wizards of the Coast unless otherwise noted.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Time for a Change

Time for a Change — Blue Ink Alchemy

The hardware issues I'm having at the workplace have me thinking it's time to revamp the system at home. And this blog shouldn't go untouched either. This layout's gotten a bit cluttered and I'd like to replace it with something a bit more polished and professional. I dug around WordPress Theme Base, but I'm uncertain of which one to proceed with. Black Abstract is a more austere type of Soul Vision but it could lead to similar clutter issues. The Scroll, Papyrus and Blak Magik all feel a bit gimmicky. On the other hand, themes like deCoder seem a bit generic. If anybody out there has helpful suggestions on where to find better themes, please let me know. Meanwhile I'll be here, either recovering from a lost morning of productivity or giving the system at home a good scrubbing.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

The Old Workhorse

The Old Workhorse — Blue Ink Alchemy

I'm typing this entry from a computer that's nearly ten years old. It's been through several moves, more than its share of crises, and quite a few attempts on my part to "fix" it. The 6 key is practically falling off of it, I've had to replace its power supply twice, and I occasionally need to 'reset' the power button by lifting the entire panel in which the button rests with a small flathead screwdriver. And I love it. I'm not in a position where I can afford multiple copies of Windows, which makes the prospect of reformatting my main PC a bit daunting (I'm still using XP on it), but since the laptop isn't exactly state of the art and won't be running things like World of Warcraft or Mass Effect 3 I don't have to put the latest drivers and most compatible OS on it. Instead for the last couple of years it's been my Linux box. Specifically, I've been running Ubuntu for the most part, lately giving its somewhat stripped-down Xubuntu variant a try. It can be a bit of a struggle to get certain things working. I've been trying since Friday to get Kindle for PC running on this thing through the Windows emulator Wine, but the damn thing keeps looking at me funny and giving me a 'fixme' DPI error. Others on the Interwebs have run into this issue as well, but so far a general fix has not been forthcoming. Very frustrating. I may have to take my issue over to the general Ubuntu forums and see if anything shakes out there. That's one of the nice things about running the system this way. Windows' customer service and knowledge base can become a bit tangled. Getting help from the Linux community is usually a bit more of a straightforward process, provided you post a thread in the right place and provide adequate information. More than one issue I've had with either the OS itself or trying to get something to run on it has been resolved through helpful back-and-forth across the forums. It hasn't always been prompt, but it's always been useful and a worthwhile endeavor. And did I mention all of this stuff is free? The software, the support, all of it. This laptop might have been replaced in another household long ago, but thanks to free software that runs like a champ on its aged hardware, it's still working for me. I can take it on the train to write, and if I can get Kindle running on it it'll be useful for reading new books and stories as well. It's a bit of a pain in the ass at times, but it beats the alternative of shelling out for a new-fangled machine. It'd still be nice to run World of Warcraft on a laptop though.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Powers Cosmic

Powers Cosmic — Blue Ink Alchemy

I grew up on the old Buck Rogers and Battlestar Galactica TV series, at least until Star Trek: the Next Generation started. There's a lot of good science fiction out there to be read, and while I definitely enjoy and appreciate harder sci-fi, from Niven & Pournelle's The Mote in God's Eye to Moon, the more sweeping and somewhat fantastical epics always find that soft spot in my heart, the place where I'm still twelve years old and believe that I can accomplish anything. Which probably explains some of my more erratic behavior. Take Marvel Comics' Annihilation, for example. A series of story arcs collected into graphic novels and consumed by Yours Truly, Annihilation is a war in space involving just about every character from the Marvel Universe outside of Earth (which was undergoing the Civil War at the time). Old characters got modern revamps, hated enemies forged alliances of convenience, Thanos was a canny and manipulative bastard and "normal" folks got some of the best lines. There's plenty of action and great alien locations, making a Halo campaign look like a day at a firing range in comparison. There's a sequel (Annihilation:Conquest) and a follow-up series, Guardians of the Galaxy, that had my attention for that short while I was able to afford monthly comic books. I'll always have Annihilation, though. Recently my wife and I finished watching the re-imagined Battlestar Galactica series. It was her first time watching it, and the first time I'd watched that many episodes back to back. In retrospect, RDM modernizing the "Wagon Train to the Stars" storyline and deepening the mythologies at play was a very smart decision, as it deepened the characters and made the story more gripping. Even the much-maligned series finale plays much better by the light of what goes before it, without weeks of fanboy speculation/rage clouding the issue. However, in watching it again I noticed there were some interesting similarities between it and Annihilation that makes them and their ilk so damn appealing to me. I'm a sucker for good characterization, and these stories tend to provide a heaping amount of characters. BSG in particular involved quite a few ascended extras. Marvel went back to the barrel and pulled out a lot of semi-forgotten cosmic characters, from Drax the Destroyer to Quasar, and brought them front and center in a variety of ways. Drax goes from a hulking green-skinned joke of a character to something resembling Riddick. It was like seeing Starbuck change from the ladykilling Dirk Benedict to the foul-mouthed insubordinate best-frakking-pilot-we've-got Katee Sackhoff. In both cases, the campy old version makes me smile and chuckle, while the updated version makes me smile because the character's gone from camp to badass in the space of 5 minutes. Doctor Who probably qualifies under this sort of science fictiony pleasure as well, but that'd be a post in and of itself.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

IT CAME FROM NETFLIX! Lady Death

IT CAME FROM NETFLIX! Lady Death — Blue Ink Alchemy

[audio:http://www.blueinkalchemy.com/uploads/lady_death.mp3] Not every adaptation has to be 100% accurate in its translation of the source material. I mean, honestly, how would the Lord of the Rings film trilogy had been helped by the presence of Tom Bombadil? In spite of his absence, the films are faithful to the spirit of the books, encapsulating the epic journeys of the Fellowship and the struggle to overcome the forces of evil. I bring this up because Lady Death suffers from a problem entirely different from missing a couple incidental characters. It's missing just about everything that made the original enjoyable. Lady Death got her start in the now-defunct CHAOS! Comics, the brainchild of Brian Pulido and the late Steven Hughes. She was initially cast merely as the eye-candy head-girlfriend of flagship character Evil Ernie, but proved popular enough that she got her own stories in the form of several mini-series and the occasional unrelated but not-unwelcome 'swimsuit' issue. Her story was that of a young girl named Hope who had the misfortune of being labeled a witch in Mideval Europe. Burning at the stake, she cries out to anyone or anything that can save her, and Lucifer answers. Hope has no desire to suffer in Hell has she did in life, but is told by Lucifer that she will never go free as long as living men walk the Earth. Hope's answer is to hook up with a renegade eldritch blacksmith and vow to kill every single human being on the planet just to stick it to Lucifer. Now there's a female empowerment story for you! The movie takes a slightly different tack from a plot perspective. Instead of looking to get one over on Old Scratch, Hope undergoes her transformation and training for a more straight-up showdown scenario, the plan being for her to overthrow Lucifer and reign in Hell as a slightly less prickish potentate. The intent was to make Lady Death a little bit more of a 'positive' heroine instead of an anti-heroine. At least, that's my understanding. While the concept alone takes away from some of the uniqueness of her character, it doesn't dilute her symbolism. A woman consistently and thoroughly screwed over by men taking up arms to overthrow a male oppressor is still in keeping with Pulido's original concept. While Lady Death can face challenges or even defeat, she never, ever plays the victim.
We miss you, Steve. The same cannot be said for the rest of the source material. Pulido and Hughes were never afraid to veer into camp territory occasionally, and more than once you'll catch Lady Death enjoying the slaughter she visits upon those in her path, sporing one of Hughes' trademark grins. The movie's masters, on the other hand, seem to have drained all of the life and joy out of Lady Death's character along with her skin color. While playing her as more of the stereotypical stoic anti-hero might seem more fitting of the character by virtue of her name, both Brian Pulido and Neil Gaiman would tell you that a character named Death need not be... well, dead. A big part of this major flaw in the movie comes from the era in which Lady Death was born. You see, in the 90s there was a trend of comic book protagonists who had some connection to the afterlife, be it J.O. Barr's resurrected avenger The Crow or Todd MacFarlane's anti-hero-from-Hell Spawn. While J.O. did it better than just about anybody else, there was no shortage of pretenders to this genre and the concurrent explosion of dark, edgy entertainment just about anywhere you looked. The explosion of the goth subculture seemed to have a lot of young people dressing in black and extolling the virtues of these damned heroes. Lady Death, in retrospect, seems to have had purpose that was two-fold, at least while she was under the control of CHAOS! - bring a much-needed female protagonist into this mix, and take the piss out of the genre at the same time by letting Lady Death enjoy being an infernal vixen of might and destruction. She never seems to enjoy anything she does in the movie, and the whole thing suffers as a result.
I could do better line work than this. And I suck. It also suffers from some of the choppiest animation I have ever seen. I've indulged in more than my share of both anime and US-grown cartoons. ADV Films usually distributes anime, but don't be fooled by the emblem on this thing. This is nowhere near as good as Evangelion or Berserk in terms of art or execution. The whole thing feels rushed, like it's more the result of a high-schooler's Lady Death fan-fiction brought to life than the concerted effort of a serious animation studio. And if it were based on a fanfic, there'd be a bit more titillation going on. A big part of Lady Death's appeal has been her look and the way she casually flaunts her sexuality, even if the art that followed in the wake of Steve's unfortunate passing dialed down the nihilistic glee that was just as much a part of her character as her skimpy outfits. But the lackluster nature of this animation means that there isn't much enjoyment to be had looking at her. Add some flat voice acting, a plodding story pace and a total lack of originality to the mix and you have about a hundred minutes of completely wasted time. Don't take this review as a condemnation of Lady Death. On the contrary, even after a few reboots she still functions as the rare female protagonist in comic books who isn't over-sexualized or completely undermined by the presence of males. Sure, she's fun to look at, but her exploits are usually just as much fun to read. Seek out her books if you'd like to find out more about her, but as for the movie, skip it. Your time would be better spent finding some of that fan-fiction I mentioned. Especially if it crosses over with, say, Vampirella or something.
...Apparently, this is a canon crossover. ...AWESOME. Josh Loomis can't always make it to the local megaplex, and thus must turn to alternative forms of cinematic entertainment. There might not be overpriced soda pop & over-buttered popcorn, and it's unclear if this week's film came in the mail or was delivered via the dark & mysterious tubes of the Internet. Only one thing is certain... IT CAME FROM NETFLIX.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Opinion Is Not Fact

Opinion Is Not Fact — Blue Ink Alchemy

Most individuals with a modicum of intelligence and self-awareness will tell you the truth, uncomfortable as it might be: Not everything you produce is going to be good. Even if the idea seems immaculate in your imagination, the transition between brain and mouth or fingers can dilute it somewhat. We have to clarify ourselves at times, in order to ensure we're understood, meaning the way we initally articulated ourselves was imperfect. So too are our ideas: the perspective we have on the world around us, the stories we experience and the events of our lives is unique. We each have our own unique opinions and the Internet makes it possible for us to share, discuss and debate them. It's this diversity that makes living with other human beings, at times, a wonderful experience. At other times it's grueling torture because some people don't understand their imperfection. You've seen these people. You've read their comments on forums, YouTube channels and Twitter feeds. Barely coherent, badly misspelled, over-abbreviated and wholly inaccurate ramblings that, when challenged, incite anger and accusations rather than honest debate. I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the sad fact of the matter is that the amount of hatred spewing from the mouths and fingers of the ignorant far outweighs the pontifications of people who actually have something to say and the means with which to say it to a large audience. And when someone does gain a large audience, the arrogant and entitled flock to the outlet in question to make their voices heard, piggyback on success, do their damndest to outshine the reason they showed up in the first place. I'm guilty of this behavior, if I'm honest. I've chimed in on the videos of those sharing their reviews, opinions and news readings not just to support their efforts but in an effort to promote myself and my work. I have to. If I hope to have any success in the mass market when it comes to selling fiction, I have to get used to the idea of selling myself through any means necessary. Now, I don't post on forums or respond to tweets for this purpose alone. I'm not a SEO bot or a web marketer. But I'd be lying if I said I do what I do simply for the enjoyment of it. Even if it is a great deal of fun to talk about ways The Dark Knight Rises could go horribly wrong with twitter peeps (tweeps), it's getting my name out and there's nothing wrong with that. What bothers me is the behavior of people who post their thoughts for the sole purpose of dissention and rabble-rousing. Constructive criticism is one thing, combative, racist or incendiary commentary is quite another. It's rude, dickish behavior that can border on harassment in certain contexts, behavior for which you can be banned from whatever venue you were using to spew your ignorant bile. And yet, it persists. These people keep right on finding ways to annoy and harrangue, under the presumption that not only is their opinion the only correct one (arrogance), they have every right to voice it any way they wish to whomever will listen (entitlement). Critical analysis and review is everywhere on the Internet. But you will never catch any such entertainer worth their salt telling you point-blank that they are 100% right in their opinion and everybody else is wrong. Go ahead and take a look. Yahtzee, MovieBob, SFDebris, Confused Matthew, Red Letter Media, TotalBiscuit, the Extra Credits crew - none of them end a discussion with "I'm right, you're wrong, your mom agreed with me last night" in any serious discussion. Some of them may play this sort of thing for laughs, but even the most satirical and cynical of these folks are also intelligent enough to know that anything upon which they might pontificate involves the exposition of their own subjective views. Sorry, that was a lot of big words. Put simply: None of these people believes they are a holy authority on anything they talk about. Yes, some of them are professional critics, paid to give their opinion based on the years of experience they have weighing objective and subjective criteria of various media, but each and every one of them are human beings, and human beings are fallible, subjective creatures. Yahtzee and MovieBob might not like shooters, but that doesn't mean shooters are bad. People like those caricatured by MovieBob's Anti-Thinker may consider retro games to be stupid, but them saying it does not make it so. These people I've mentioned know this. It's a shame a lot of the people who chime in on their presentations can't have the same sort of self-awareness. And when you try to point out the flaws in their arguments, their mental couch forts repel your critiques with such eloquent responses as "NO U" or "COOL STORY BRO." Just because your point of view makes more intellectual or logical sense doesn't mean you're going to win over the mistaken. Ours is a culture that nurtures the arrogant and entitled, and trolls of this stripe thrive in this culture, the pundits and politicians ranting on about rights and freedoms while these dregs emerge from under their bridges to tell you why your opinion sucks and theirs is The Truth. It's a level of impenetrability to reality that would be impressive if it weren't so pathetic. I don't know what I hope to accomplish by posting this, other than to bring attention to and underscore the causes behind this prevailing sentiment among the seething and apparently idiotic masses of the Internet. Because like any disease, the more we know about the causes, the better chance we have of finding a cure. If one even exists.

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Blue Ink Alchemy

Opinion Is Not Fact

Opinion Is Not Fact — Blue Ink Alchemy

Most individuals with a modicum of intelligence and self-awareness will tell you the truth, uncomfortable as it might be: Not everything you produce is going to be good. Even if the idea seems immaculate in your imagination, the transition between brain and mouth or fingers can dilute it somewhat. We have to clarify ourselves at times, in order to ensure we're understood, meaning the way we initally articulated ourselves was imperfect. So too are our ideas: the perspective we have on the world around us, the stories we experience and the events of our lives is unique. We're entitled to our opinions and the Internet makes it possible for us to share, discuss and debate them. It's this diversity that makes living with other human beings, at times, a wonderful experience. At other times it's grueling torture because some people don't understand their imperfection. You've seen these people. You've read their comments on forums, YouTube channels and Twitter feeds. Barely coherent, badly misspelled, over-abbreviated and wholly inaccurate ramblings that, when challenged, incite anger and accusations rather than honest debate. I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the sad fact of the matter is that the amount of hatred spewing from the mouths and fingers of the ignorant far outweighs the pontifications of people who actually have something to say and the means with which to say it to a large audience. And when someone does gain a large audience, the arrogant and entitled flock to the outlet in question to make their voices heard, piggyback on success, do their damndest to outshine the reason they showed up in the first place. I'm guilty of this behavior, if I'm honest. I've chimed in on the videos of those sharing their reviews, opinions and news readings not just to support their efforts but in an effort to promote myself and my work. I have to. If I hope to have any success in the mass market when it comes to selling fiction, I have to get used to the idea of selling myself through any means necessary. Now, I don't post on forums or respond to tweets for this purpose alone. I'm not a SEO bot or a web marketer. But I'd be lying if I said I do what I do simply for the enjoyment of it. Even if it is a great deal of fun to talk about ways The Dark Knight Rises could go horribly wrong with twitter peeps (tweeps), it's getting my name out and there's nothing wrong with that. What bothers me is the behavior of people who post their thoughts for the sole purpose of dissention and rabble-rousing. Constructive criticism is one thing, combative, racist or incendiary commentary is quite another. It's rude, dickish behavior that can border on harassment in certain contexts, behavior for which you can be banned from whatever venue you were using to spew your ignorant bile. And yet, it persists. These people keep right on finding ways to annoy and harrangue, under the presumption that not only is their opinion the only correct one (arrogance), they have every right to voice it any way they wish to whomever will listen (entitlement). Critical analysis and review is everywhere on the Internet. But you will never catch any such entertainer worth their salt telling you point-blank that they are 100% right in their opinion and everybody else is wrong. Go ahead and take a look. Yahtzee, MovieBob, SFDebris, Confused Matthew, Red Letter Media, TotalBiscuit, the Extra Credits crew - none of them end a discussion with "I'm right, you're wrong, your mom agreed with me last night" in any serious discussion. Some of them may play this sort of thing for laughs, but even the most satirical and cynical of these folks are also intelligent enough to know that anything upon which they might pontificate involves the exposition of their own subjective views. Sorry, that was a lot of big words. Put simply: None of these people believes they are a holy authority on anything they talk about. Yes, some of them are professional critics, paid to give their opinion based on the years of experience they have weighing objective and subjective criteria of various media, but each and every one of them are human beings, and human beings are fallible, subjective creatures. Yahtzee and MovieBob might not like shooters, but that doesn't mean shooters are bad. People like those caricatured by MovieBob's Anti-Thinker may consider retro games to be stupid, but them saying it does not make it so. These people I've mentioned know this. It's a shame a lot of the people who chime in on their presentations can't have the same sort of self-awareness. And when you try to point out the flaws in their arguments, their mental couch forts repel your critiques with such eloquent responses as "NO U" or "COOL STORY BRO." Just because your point of view makes more intellectual or logical sense doesn't mean you're going to win over the mistaken. Ours is a culture that nurtures the arrogant and entitled, and trolls of this stripe thrive in this culture, the pundits and politicians ranting on about rights and freedoms while these dregs emerge from under their bridges to tell you why your opinion sucks and theirs is The Truth. It's a level of impenetrability to reality that would be impressive if it weren't so pathetic. I don't know what I hope to accomplish by posting this, other than to bring attention to and underscore the causes behind this prevailing sentiment among the seething and apparently idiotic masses of the Internet. Because like any disease, the more we know about the causes, the better chance we have of finding a cure. If one even exists.

---

Blue Ink Alchemy

Opinion Is Not Fact

Opinion Is Not Fact — Blue Ink Alchemy

Most individuals with a modicum of intelligence and self-awareness will tell you the truth, uncomfortable as it might be: Not everything you produce is going to be good. Even if the idea seems immaculate in your imagination, the transition between brain and mouth or fingers can dilute it somewhat. We have to clarify ourselves at times, in order to ensure we're understood, meaning the way we initally articulated ourselves was imperfect. So too are our ideas: the perspective we have on the world around us, the stories we experience and the events of our lives is unique. It's this diversity that makes living with other human beings, at times, a wonderful experience. At other times it's grueling torture because some people don't understand their imperfection. You've seen these people. You've read their comments on forums, YouTube channels and Twitter feeds. Barely coherent, badly misspelled, over-abbreviated and wholly inaccurate ramblings that, when challenged, incite anger and accusations rather than honest debate. I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the sad fact of the matter is that the amount of hatred spewing from the mouths and fingers of the ignorant far outweighs the pontifications of people who actually have something to say and the means with which to say it to a large audience. And when someone does gain a large audience, the arrogant and entitled flock to the outlet in question to make their voices heard, piggyback on success, do their damndest to outshine the reason they showed up in the first place. I'm guilty of this behavior, if I'm honest. I've chimed in on the videos of those sharing their reviews, opinions and news readings not just to support their efforts but in an effort to promote myself and my work. I have to. If I hope to have any success in the mass market when it comes to selling fiction, I have to get used to the idea of selling myself through any means necessary. Now, I don't post on forums or respond to tweets for this purpose alone. I'm not a SEO bot or a web marketer. But I'd be lying if I said I do what I do simply for the enjoyment of it. Even if it is a great deal of fun to talk about ways The Dark Knight Rises could go horribly wrong with twitter peeps (tweeps), it's getting my name out and there's nothing wrong with that. What bothers me is the behavior of people who post their thoughts for the sole purpose of dissention and rabble-rousing. Constructive criticism is one thing, combative, racist or incendiary commentary is quite another. It's rude, dickish behavior that can border on harassment in certain contexts, behavior for which you can be banned from whatever venue you were using to spew your ignorant bile. And yet, it persists. These people keep right on finding ways to annoy and harrangue, under the presumption that not only is their opinion the only correct one (arrogance), they have every right to voice it any way they wish to whomever will listen (entitlement). Critical analysis and review is everywhere on the Internet. But you will never catch any such entertainer worth their salt telling you point-blank that they are 100% right in their opinion and everybody else is wrong. Go ahead and take a look. Yahtzee, MovieBob, SFDebris, Confused Matthew, Red Letter Media, TotalBiscuit, the Extra Credits crew - none of them end a discussion with "I'm right, you're wrong, your mom agreed with me last night" in any serious discussion. Some of them may play this sort of thing for laughs, but even the most satirical and cynical of these folks are also intelligent enough to know that anything upon which they might pontificate involves the exposition of their own subjective views. Sorry, that was a lot of big words. Put simply: None of these people believes they are a holy authority on anything they talk about. Yes, some of them are professional critics, paid to give their opinion based on the years of experience they have weighing objective and subjective criteria of various media, but each and every one of them are human beings, and human beings are fallible, subjective creatures. Yahtzee and MovieBob might not like shooters, but that doesn't mean shooters are bad. People like those caricatured by MovieBob's Anti-Thinker may consider retro games to be stupid, but them saying it does not make it so. These people I've mentioned know this. It's a shame a lot of the people who chime in on their presentations can't have the same sort of self-awareness. And when you try to point out the flaws in their arguments, their mental couch forts repel your critiques with such eloquent responses as "NO U" or "COOL STORY BRO." Just because your point of view makes more intellectual or logical sense doesn't mean you're going to win over the mistaken. Ours is a culture that nurtures the arrogant and entitled, and trolls of this stripe thrive in this culture, the pundits and politicians ranting on about rights and freedoms while these dregs emerge from under their bridges to tell you why your opinion sucks and theirs is The Truth. It's a level of impenetrability to reality that would be impressive if it weren't so pathetic. I don't know what I hope to accomplish by posting this, other than to bring attention to and underscore the causes behind this prevailing sentiment among the seething and apparently idiotic masses of the Internet. Because like any disease, the more we know about the causes, the better chance we have of finding a cure. If one even exists.

---

Blue Ink Alchemy

Opinion Is Not Fact

Opinion Is Not Fact — Blue Ink Alchemy

Most individuals with a modicum of intelligence and self-awareness will tell you the truth, uncomfortable as it might be: Not everything you produce is going to be good. Even if the idea seems immaculate in your imagination, the transition between brain and mouth or fingers can dilute it somewhat. We have to clarify ourselves at times, in order to ensure we're understood, meaning the way we initally articulated ourselves was imperfect. So too are our ideas: the perspective we have on the world around us, the stories we experience and the events of our lives is unique. It's this diversity that makes living with other human beings, at times, a wonderful experience. At other times it's grueling torture because some people don't understand their imperfection. You've seen these people. You've read their comments on forums, YouTube channels and Twitter feeds. Barely coherent, badly misspelled, over-abbreviated and wholly inaccurate ramblings that, when challenged, incite anger and accusations rather than honest debate. I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the sad fact of the matter is that the amount of hatred spewing from the mouths and fingers of the ignorant far outweighs the pontifications of people who actually have something to say and the means with which to say it to a large audience. And when someone does gain a large audience, the arrogant and entitled flock to the outlet in question to make their voices heard, piggyback on success, do their damndest to outshine the reason they showed up in the first place. I'm guilty of this behavior, if I'm honest. I've chimed in on the videos of those sharing their reviews, opinions and news readings not just to support their efforts but in an effort to promote myself and my work. I have to. If I hope to have any success in the mass market when it comes to selling fiction, I have to get used to the idea of selling myself through any means necessary. Now, I don't post on forums or respond to tweets for this purpose alone. I'm not a SEO bot or a web marketer. But I'd be lying if I said I do what I do simply for the enjoyment of it. Even if it is a great deal of fun to talk about ways The Dark Knight Rises could go horribly wrong with twitter peeps (tweeps), it's getting my name out and there's nothing wrong with that. What bothers me is the behavior of people who post their thoughts for the sole purpose of dissention and rabble-rousing. Constructive criticism is one thing, combative, racist or incendiary commentary is quite another. It's rude, dickish behavior that can border on harassment in certain contexts, behavior for which you can be banned from whatever venue you were using to spew your ignorant bile. And yet, it persists. These people keep right on finding ways to annoy and harrangue, under the presumption that not only is their opinion the only correct one (arrogance), they have every right to voice it any way they wish to whomever will listen (entitlement). Critical analysis and review is everywhere on the Internet. But you will never catch any such entertainer worth their salt telling you point-blank that they are 100% right in their opinion and everybody else is wrong. Go ahead and take a look. Yahtzee, MovieBob, SFDebris, Confused Matthew, Red Letter Media, TotalBiscuit, the Extra Credits crew - none of them end a discussion with "I'm right, you're wrong, your mom agreed with me last night" in any serious discussion. Some of them may play this sort of thing for laughs, but even the most satirical and cynical of these folks are also intelligent enough to know that anything upon which they might pontificate involves the exposition of their own subjective views. Sorry, that was a lot of big words. Put simply: None of these people believes they are a holy authority on anything they talk about. Yes, some of them are professional critics, paid to give their opinion based on the years of experience they have weighing objective and subjective criteria of various media, but each and every one of them are human beings, and human beings are fallible, subjective creatures. Yahtzee and MovieBob might not like shooters, but that doesn't mean shooters are bad. People like those caricatured by MovieBob's Anti-Thinker may consider retro games to be stupid, but them saying it does not make it so. These people I've mentioned know this. It's a shame a lot of the people who chime in on their presentations can't have the same sort of self-awareness. And when you try to point out the flaws in their arguments, their mental couch forts repel your critiques with such eloquent responses as "NO U" or "COOL STORY BRO." Just because your point of view makes more intellectual or logical sense doesn't mean you're going to win over the mistaken. Ours is a culture that nurtures the arrogant and entitled, and trolls of this stripe thrive in this culture, the pundits and politicians ranting on about rights and freedoms while these dregs emerge from under their bridges to tell you why your opinion sucks and theirs is The Truth. It's a level of impenetrability to reality that would be impressive if it weren't so pathetic. I don't know what I hope to accomplish by posting this, other than to bring attention to and underscore the causes behind this prevailing sentiment among the seething and apparently idiotic masses of the Internet. Because like any disease, the more we know about the causes, the better chance we have of finding a cure. If one even exists.

---

Blue Ink Alchemy

Your Opinion Sucks

Your Opinion Sucks — Blue Ink Alchemy

Most individuals with a modicum of intelligence and self-awareness will tell you the truth, uncomfortable as it might be: Not everything you produce is going to be good. Even if the idea seems immaculate in your imagination, the transition between brain and mouth or fingers can dilute it somewhat. We have to clarify ourselves at times, in order to ensure we're understood, meaning the way we initally articulated ourselves was imperfect. So too are our ideas: the perspective we have on the world around us, the stories we experience and the events of our lives is unique. It's this diversity that makes living with other human beings, at times, a wonderful experience. At other times it's grueling torture because some people don't understand their imperfection. You've seen these people. You've read their comments on forums, YouTube channels and Twitter feeds. Barely coherent, badly misspelled, over-abbreviated and wholly inaccurate ramblings that, when challenged, incite anger and accusations rather than honest debate. I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the sad fact of the matter is that the amount of hatred spewing from the mouths and fingers of the ignorant far outweighs the pontifications of people who actually have something to say and the means with which to say it to a large audience. And when someone does gain a large audience, the arrogant and entitled flock to the outlet in question to make their voices heard, piggyback on success, do their damndest to outshine the reason they showed up in the first place. I'm guilty of this behavior, if I'm honest. I've chimed in on the videos of those sharing their reviews, opinions and news readings not just to support their efforts but in an effort to promote myself and my work. I have to. If I hope to have any success in the mass market when it comes to selling fiction, I have to get used to the idea of selling myself through any means necessary. Now, I don't post on forums or respond to tweets for this purpose alone. I'm not a SEO bot or a web marketer. But I'd be lying if I said I do what I do simply for the enjoyment of it. Even if it is a great deal of fun to talk about ways The Dark Knight Rises could go horribly wrong with twitter peeps (tweeps), it's getting my name out and there's nothing wrong with that. What bothers me is the behavior of people who post their thoughts for the sole purpose of dissention and rabble-rousing. Constructive criticism is one thing, combative, racist or incendiary commentary is quite another. It's rude, dickish behavior that can border on harassment in certain contexts, behavior for which you can be banned from whatever venue you were using to spew your ignorant bile. And yet, it persists. These people keep right on finding ways to annoy and harrangue, under the presumption that not only is their opinion the only correct one (arrogance), they have every right to voice it any way they wish to whomever will listen (entitlement). Critical analysis and review is everywhere on the Internet. But you will never catch any such entertainer worth their salt telling you point-blank that they are 100% right in their opinion and everybody else is wrong. Go ahead and take a look. Yahtzee, MovieBob, SFDebris, Confused Matthew, Red Letter Media, TotalBiscuit, the Extra Credits crew - none of them end a discussion with "I'm right, you're wrong, your mom agreed with me last night" in any serious discussion. Some of them may play this sort of thing for laughs, but even the most satirical and cynical of these folks are also intelligent enough to know that anything upon which they might pontificate involves the exposition of their own subjective views. Sorry, that was a lot of big words. Put simply: None of these people believes they are a holy authority on anything they talk about. Yes, some of them are professional critics, paid to give their opinion based on the years of experience they have weighing objective and subjective criteria of various media, but each and every one of them are human beings, and human beings are fallible, subjective creatures. Yahtzee and MovieBob might not like shooters, but that doesn't mean shooters are bad. People like those caricatured by MovieBob's Anti-Thinker may consider retro games to be stupid, but them saying it does not make it so. These people I've mentioned know this. It's a shame a lot of the people who chime in on their presentations can't have the same sort of self-awareness. And when you try to point out the flaws in their arguments, their mental couch forts repel your critiques with such eloquent responses as "NO U" or "COOL STORY BRO." Just because your point of view makes more intellectual or logical sense doesn't mean you're going to win over the mistaken. Ours is a culture that nurtures the arrogant and entitled, and trolls of this stripe thrive in this culture, the pundits and politicians ranting on about rights and freedoms while these dregs emerge from under their bridges to tell you why your opinion sucks and theirs is The Truth. It's a level of impenetrability to reality that would be impressive if it weren't so pathetic. I don't know what I hope to accomplish by posting this, other than to bring attention to and underscore the causes behind this prevailing sentiment among the seething and apparently idiotic masses of the Internet. Because like any disease, the more we know about the causes, the better chance we have of finding a cure. If one even exists.

---

Blue Ink Alchemy

Your Opinion Sucks

Your Opinion Sucks — Blue Ink Alchemy

Most individuals with a modicum of intelligence and self-awareness will tell you the truth, uncomfortable as it might be: Not everything you produce is going to be good. Even if the idea seems immaculate in your imagination, the transition between brain and mouth or fingers can dilute it somewhat. We have to clarify ourselves at times, in order to ensure we're understood, meaning the way we initally articulated ourselves was imperfect. So too are our ideas: the perspective we have on the world around us, the stories we experience and the events of our lives is unique. It's this diversity that makes living with other human beings, at times, a wonderful experience. At other times it's grueling torture because some people don't understand their imperfection. You've seen these people. You've read their comments on forums, YouTube channels and Twitter feeds. Barely coherent, badly misspelled, over-abbreviated and wholly inaccurate ramblings that, when challenged, incite anger and accusations rather than honest debate. I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the sad fact of the matter is that the amount of hatred spewing from the mouths and fingers of the ignorant far outweighs the pontifications of people who actually have something to say and the means with which to say it to a large audience. And when someone does gain a large audience, the arrogant and entitled flock to the outlet in question to make their voices heard, piggyback on success, do their damndest to outshine the reason they showed up in the first place. I'm guilty of this behavior, if I'm honest. I've chimed in on the videos of those sharing their reviews, opinions and news readings not just to support their efforts but in an effort to promote myself and my work. I have to. If I hope to have any success in the mass market when it comes to selling fiction, I have to get used to the idea of selling myself through any means necessary. Now, I don't post on forums or respond to tweets for this purpose alone. I'm not a SEO bot or a web marketer. But I'd be lying if I said I do what I do simply for the enjoyment of it. Even if it is a great deal of fun to talk about ways The Dark Knight Rises could go horribly wrong with twitter peeps (tweeps), it's getting my name out and there's nothing wrong with that. What bothers me is the behavior of people who post their thoughts for the sole purpose of dissention and rabble-rousing. Constructive criticism is one thing, combative, racist or incendiary commentary is quite another. It's rude, dickish behavior that can border on harassment in certain contexts, behavior for which you can be banned from whatever venue you were using to spew your ignorant bile. And yet, it persists. These people keep right on finding ways to annoy and harrangue, under the presumption that not only is their opinion the only correct one (arrogance), they have every right to voice it any way they wish to whomever will listen (entitlement). Critical analysis and review is everywhere on the Internet. But you will never catch any such entertainer worth their salt telling you point-blank that they are 100% right in their opinion and everybody else is wrong. Go ahead and take a look. Yahtzee, MovieBob, SFDebris, Confused Matthew, Red Letter Media, TotalBiscuit, the Extra Credits crew - none of them end a discussion with "I'm right, you're wrong, your mom agreed with me last night" in any serious discussion. Some of them may play this sort of thing for laughs, but even the most satirical and cynical of these folks are also intelligent enough to know that anything upon which they might pontificate involves the exposition of their own subjective views. Sorry, that was a lot of big words. Put simply: None of these people believes they are a holy authority on anything they talk about. Yes, some of them are professional critics, paid to give their opinion based on the years of experience they have weighing objective and subjective criteria of various media, but each and every one of them are human beings, and human beings are fallible, subjective creatures. Yahtzee and MovieBob might not like shooters, but that doesn't mean shooters are bad. People like those caricatured by MovieBob's Anti-Thinker may consider retro games to be stupid, but them saying it does not make it so. These people I've mentioned know this. It's a shame a lot of the people who chime in on their presentations can't have the same sort of self-awareness. And when you try to point out the flaws in their arguments, their mental couch forts repel your critiques with such eloquent responses as "NO U" or "COOL STORY BRO." Just because your point of view makes more intellectual or logical sense doesn't mean you're going to win over the mistaken. Ours is a culture that nurtures the arrogant and entitled, and trolls of this stripe thrive in this culture, the pundits and politicians ranting on about rights and freedoms while these dregs emerge from under their bridges to tell you why your opinion sucks and theirs is The Truth. It's a level of impenetrability to reality that would be impressive if it weren't so pathetic. I don't know what I hope to accomplish by posting this, other than to bring attention to and underscore the causes behind this prevailing sentiment among the seething and apparently idiotic masses of the Internet. Because like any disease, the more we know about the causes, the better chance we have of finding a cure. If one even exists.

---

Blue Ink Alchemy